Coming of age in the 80s and 90s, I grew up believing that the start of every calendar year required a very specific ritual: making a list of things I was going to give up. I’m not entirely sure where I first gleaned the idea that a resolution had to involve stopping something—eating, drinking, spending—but it was everywhere. The media framed it that way, and the adults in my life echoed the same message.
As a kid, I took the assignment seriously. Every New Year’s Day, I’d sit down and dutifully jot out my list: drink less soda, stop swearing, don’t spend my allowance only on candy, stop fighting with my brother, no more eating cookies in bed. Even then, it felt like a lot of pressure for a child whose biggest vice was sneaking snacks under the covers.
As I got older, I tried to reframe what New Year’s Resolutions meant to me. January 1st became a fixed point on the calendar to “be healthier” or “take better care of myself.” Like so many people, I leaned into the optimism of a fresh start: signing up for a yoga studio membership, pinning smoothie recipes, booking a facial or massage, vowing daily walks and more salads. Sometimes it stuck. Often, it didn’t.
I’d love to say that after becoming a mom I reached a place of total enlightenment, where I rejected arbitrary, archaic societal expectations altogether. The truth is less glamorous: I mostly just didn’t have the time or energy to care. And maybe that, in its own way, was freeing.
A Brief History of Resolutions
Interestingly, New Year’s Resolutions weren’t always about self-denial or self-optimization. The earliest recorded resolutions date back over 4,000 years to the ancient Babylonians, who made promises to their gods at the start of the new year—usually about repaying debts or returning borrowed items. Later, the Romans adopted similar practices, pledging good conduct to Janus, the god of beginnings and transitions (and the namesake of January).
In many religious traditions, resolutions were less about personal improvement and more about reflection, accountability, and renewal. It wasn’t until much more recent history—particularly the 20th century—that resolutions became heavily tied to productivity, body image, and self-control. Understanding that history makes it easier to loosen our grip on the idea that resolutions have to look a certain way.
A Different Kind of Inspiration
Wherever you find yourself in your personal relationship with New Year’s Resolutions, the library is a wonderful place to turn for inspiration.
Want to learn something new this year? Our New Nonfiction collection is robust and diverse, covering everything from history and science to personal growth and creativity. Curious about audiobooks? Your library card gives you access to a wide selection through the Libby app and Hoopla. Perhaps your goal is simply to be more connected. The library offers a packed calendar of events designed to nourish the soul.
Maybe this year doesn’t need a list of things to give up. Maybe it can be about adding something instead: curiosity, connection, rest, or even just a good book!
